Apathy

Am I not supposed to have what I want? With all the hard work I've been doing on myself I only seem to be pushing away the ones I don't want. I know that's a good thing in and of itself, but what about the ones I do want? They are no closer to me now than they were before. The most I get is that they are happy I was interested. But why is everyone so afraid nowadays? What's happened to us? Are we so jaded and burned that we simply cease to care and isolate in order to protect ourselves? I feel myself slowly slipping into this habit. I really don't understand it all.